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A groundbreaking synthesis of mindfulness, somatics and Nonviolent Communication

Simple yet powerful practices to develop healthy, effective, and more satisfying ways of communicating

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how to find your voice, speak your truth and listen deeply

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We spend so much of our lives talking to each other, but how much are we simply running on automatic—relying on old habits and hoping for the best? Are we able to truly hear others and speak our mind in a clear and kind way, without needing to get defensive or go on the attack?

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The techniques in Say What You Mean will help you to:

  • Feel confident during conversation

  • Stay focused on what really matters in an interaction

  • Listen for the authentic concerns behind what others say

  • Reduce anxiety before and during difficult conversations

  • Find nourishment in day-to-day interactions

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“With clarity and great insight, Oren Jay Sofer offers teachings and practices that train us to speak and listen with presence, courage and an open heart.

Tara Brach, author of True Refuge and Radical Acceptance

Every order includes these special gifts from Oren:

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Written reflections and practices to start your communication journey

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Bonus guided meditations on Mindful Communication

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Free download of first chapter plus a short eBook on contemplative practice

Instructions

1.

Purchase a copy from your local bookstore or vendor below.
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2.

Get the receipt / order #
from your purchase.
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3.

Fill in the form below
to receive your gifts by email!

Order Your Copy

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“This tremendous book addresses one of the biggest challenges in any relationship: how to combine heart with strength, compassion with assertiveness.

If I had just one book to recommend about interpersonal communication, it would be this one.”

Rick Hanson, PhD author of Hardwiring Happiness

Oren brings a clear, new voice to interpersonal communication.

“In Say What You Mean, Oren Jay Sofer offers us a brilliant intertwining of focused presence and artful engagement. Our work, family, and any other relationships will benefit from his guidance.”


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Daniel Goleman

Author of Emotional Intelligence and Altered Traits

“Sofer deftly weaves together his mindfulness practice and principles of Nonviolent Communication to help us learn how to find one another again. This is a powerful guidebook to thinking, speaking and listening with authenticity and care. Bravo!”

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Sharon Salzberg

Author of Real Love and Real Happiness

“Oren Jay Sofer's eloquent book goes beyond the surface level of communication. He describes our relational journey . . . and how to fully live this complex life. Sofer gives us essential frameworks, perspectives, and skills for our shared humanity.”

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Larry Yang 

Author of Awakening Together


“Meeting the enormous challenges of our times calls for an integration of inner practices of mindfulness with outer practices of communicating with honesty, vulnerability, strength, care and empathy. Oren Jay Sofer shows us a way to do just that in his book Say What You Mean.”

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Miki Kashtan

CNVC Certified Trainer and Author

“Words have tremendous power—both to harm, and to heal. Oren shares a process for communicating with mindfulness, clarity, and compassion, and creating more connection and understanding in our relationships. In these times of turbulence and conflict, we need this more than ever before.”  

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Chris Kresser

Author of The Paleo Cure and Unconventional Medicine 

“Full of practical exercises that develop powerful communication and mindfulness skills, this timely and engaging book shows us how caring, curiosity and connection can transform people's lives, even in the face of aggression.”

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Susan Kaiser-Greenland

Author of Mindful Games and The Mindful Child

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“Say What You Mean is a helpful guide for speaking wisely and with love. It offers terrific tools and understandings that are critical to the art of communicating clearly and from the heart.”

Jack Kornfield, author of The Wise Heart and No Time Like The Present

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Oren Jay Sofer

About the Author

Oren Jay Sofer teaches meditation and communication nationally.

Oren has practiced Buddhist meditation since 1997 and is a long-time student of Joseph Goldstein, Michele McDonald, and Venerable Ajahn Sucitto.

In the early 2000s, he developed a deep interest in the relationship between contemplative practice and communication. Today, his work integrating relational awareness into the field of communication stands at the cutting edge of interpersonal studies.

He holds a degree in Comparative Religion from Columbia University, is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner for healing trauma, a Certified Trainer of Nonviolent Communication, and a member of the Spirit Rock Teachers’ Council.

Oren is also the co-author of the book Teaching Mindfulness to Empower Adolescents, the founder of Next Step Dharma and co-founder of Mindful Healthcare.